Fifty New Dates
by shanejayell
Summary: After surviving Third Impact, the world's eyes fall on Shinji Ikari. Poor bastard...


Disclaimer: I own none of the characters or situations from Evangelion, I'm only borrowing them for while. Also, this is absolutely NOT to be taken seriously in any way, thank you every much.

Fifty New Dates: A Evangelion fanfiction.

By Shanejayell, with assists from Ultra Sonic 007 and the Spacebattles Forums.

Not long after third impact and before he hit the age of twenty, Shinji Ikari ended up dating with something like fifty girlfriends.

Wait, WHAT?

Well, it really wasn't THAT hard to explain.

You see, after third impact, EVERYONE had at least some awareness of what happened to humanity. They all had felt the offer Shinji was made by his mother Yui, the chance to be part of some bodiless godhead in charge of all humanity. And how he refused godhood and gave humanity the chance to live again.

In the weeks and months following impact, the world was too busy rebuilding to really take notice. Well, to take MUCH notice. It was fair to say every major media outlet on Earth fell on Tokyo-3 as soon as it was possible and jockeyed to interview young Mr. Ikari, but they came away faintly disappointed. He was so nice and sweet and polite, it wasn't funny. They couldn't even manufacture a fake scandal around him!

(Well, other than him living with the new Supreme Commander of NERV, Misato Katsuragi and Second Child Asuka Langley. But reporters quickly learned it wasn't healthy to irritate Asuka, after receiving several very thorough beat downs. Similarly, with the disappearance of Gendo Ikari Misato was now Shinji's legal guardian AND the head of NERV. And the amount of power the woman had was honestly frightening to consider.)

But as the world settled down, the governments of several major nations began to look at Tokyo-3 and NERV with a wary eye. They knew that SEELE was now defunct, their secrets revealed to the masses, but NERV itself was a massive power base. And everyone loved the great hero Shinji. So they began to move their people into place and see if they could... influence the heir apparent as well as learn any secrets he might be keeping about Third Imact.

Studying his school records and official files, the various agencies soon spotted a obvious weak point in young Mr. Ikari. While well liked by his classmates and a friendly young man, it appeared he had not had much experience with the fairer sex. (There were also hints of a homosexual interest in one Kaworu Nagisa, but it was mostly unconfirmed.) The 'honey trap' was a tried and true tool in most intelligence agencies, and each one soon deployed their agents to Tokyo-3.

However, there were problems with their plans almost as soon as it started. Misato and Section 2 spotted the influx of agents into Tokyo-3 almost immediately, and she rapidly deduced who might have sent them. Using various resources she contacted the agencies in question and warned them that they would play by HER rules, or be booted from Tokyo-3.

No killing, first of all. Misato had no wish to see Shinji traumatized by the 'mysterious' death of his current girlfriend. If a agent wanted to remove a obstacle, it had better be the old fashioned way. No serious injuries either. Misato didn't want the city becoming a battle field either. Any other rules she let the informal 'League of girl agents' settle for themselves, such as limiting the number of girls chasing Shinji at any one time, etc etc.

The various agencies agreed, if reluctantly, and things began to happen. Of course, life always was complicated...

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Shinji Ikari was humming to himself softly as he returned to the dorms. It was a sunny day, his course load was light and he didn't have a care in the world. Well, sort of. He still had the spy-girls chasing him, but he thought he was coping with that pretty well. He just tried to be friendly with them, and if something happened well that was okay. And if not he was at least getting to know new people.

Shinji opened the door to his room, noting that the door was unlocked. 'Did I forget...?' he started to think as he looked into the room and his train of thought came to a screeching halt.

Laying on his normally messy bed was a woman, her short reddish brown hair falling around her face. While not overly curvy she was very nicely shaped, something obvious because she was just wearing skimpy underwear. A push up bra left her breasts mostly exposed, the nipples poking impishly from the lace, while her long legs were clad in sheer stockings, held up by a lace garter belt. Her panties were a wispy lace confection that was almost transparent, hinting without fully revealing.

"Dwa?" Shinji managed to get out.

The beautiful young woman stopped laying on her side and sat up, her well shaped breasts bouncing a bit in her bra. "Shinji Ikari?" she purred as her glasses slid down her nose, "I'm Mari Illustrious Makinami. Nice to meet you!"

Taking a step backwards, Shinji shut the door with a thump, leaving her in there alone. 'Why me?' he wondered, leaning against the door.

"Hey!" Mari yelled from inside, "And after all the trouble I went into to get in here! Get your ass back in here!"

"Put some clothes on first!" Shinji called back to her even as his fellow students were taking notice and laughing, "Then we'll talk."

"Spoil sport," Mari pouted.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Misato blinked as she listened to Maya Ibuki's report, then sat back in her chair with a fit of giggles. "I guess miss Mari was kind of disappointed?" she asked, her purple hair shimmering.

"You could say that, yes," Maya agreed, the brown haired scientist dressed in a NERV uniform with a lab coat thrown over it. In the aftermath of Third Impact she had found herself sliding into the role of head of Project E, to her great reluctance. Still, someone had to replace Doctor Akagi, and Maya was one of the few qualified.

"Satsuki Ooi is doing a good job keeping an eye on things," Misato noted, smiling slightly as she saw the blush on Maya's cheeks. The new head of Section 2 was tall, charming and attractive, and she and Maya were spending a LOT of time together. 'Good,' she mused, 'Maya needs to get over Ritsuko somehow.' Briskly she asked, "Did Satsuki have anything else to report?"

"Well, that new girl from Britain has been busy," Maya smiled slightly.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Jesse Gartland stretched on the edge of the track field, the tall leggy blond dressed in a t-shirt and gym shorts, much like the other girls on the field. She could practically feel the boy's gazes on her as she limbered up, and hid a slight smile.

When Jesse had gotten this assignment from Military Intelligence 13 she had originally been slightly dismayed, but her professionalism soon won that over. She studied Shinji, his habits and activities, and soon thought she had found a break in his coverage. Gym class! Bribing the teacher into carrying out a mixed gender run was child's play, and now she was ready to catch Ikari in her web.

"All right everyone," the old teacher called, "we're going for staggered runs, to build up endurance. Line up, please."

Jesse saw the boys mostly gathering together, tho a few were brave enough to gawk at the attractive girls. Several of the girls were complaining about the guys leering at them, too, which made Jesse smile wryly. Shinji was mixed with a few of his classmates, Toji and Kensuke, but Jesse felt sure she could get to him.

"Ready," he raised the starter pistol and fired, "go!"

Like the born athlete she was Jesse was off, muscles flexing as she ran. There was nothing like the sensation of running, of feeling your muscles pump while the air streamed by you. She was so caught up in the run that for a moment she lost track of Shinji, then with some embarrassment noticed he was lagging far behind with his friends.

'Crap,' Jesse thought as she considered her options. She could slow down and fall back, but it would look odd considering how fast she had gone. She could also speed up a bit and try to lap Shinji, but that might embarrass him.

As she thought Jesse became aware of someone gradually catching up to her, then her eyes widened as she recognized Asuka Langley Soryu. The orange haired young woman had been badly hurt in the conflict leading up to Third Impact, and she still wasn't comfortable with her scars. Unlike most of the girls she was running in a track suit, though unlike the others she was keeping pace with Jesse pretty easily.

"Jesse, right?" Asuka asked, her amused smile implying she already knew who she was.

'She probably does at that,' Jesse conceded. "Miss Soryu," Jesse nodded, smiling slightly.

"Things not quite going as planned?" Asuka asked cheerfully. As Jesse's eyes widened in alarm Asuka added, "I pay the teachers to tell me when they get bribes, and from who."

Jesse looked at her in surprise a moment, then she chuckled softly. "Outmaneuvered by a non-agent," she shook her head wryly as they ran, "I'll never live it down."

"I won't tell if you won't," Asuka offered, smiling.

"Thanks," Jesse said, touched.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

"Asuka and Jesse are DATING?" Misato blinked in surprise. She hadn't really thought Asuka went that way...

"Satsuki doesn't go that far," Maya corrected with a smile, "but they've been hanging out together since then, off and on."

"Huh," Misato sat back, her expression thoughtful. "I'm pretty sure Asuka knows who Jesse is, but have Satsuki give her a briefing, just in case."

"Will do," Maya nodded.

Misato checked the briefing papers Section 2 had sent, "So the only other big thing for Shinji to worry about is the dorm mixer party. Hopefully the spy girls won't do anything too extreme."

Maya gave her a look, smiling.

"Right, I forgot who we were dealing with," Misato laughed. "Wanna bet someone is going to be leaving Tokyo-3 that night?"

"I'm not foolish enough to take that bet, ma'am," Maya laughed.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Several days later Sayoko Itsumi groaned as she came awake. Last thing she remembered she was at that party with Shinji... The blue haired young woman sat up, looking around the unfamiliar hotel room in confusion. The young lady got up and noted she was still in her dress, and went outside to look around. She went down the hall then found a elevator, soon reaching the main floor. She emerged into a lobby, where a finely dressed man waited behind the desk.

"Oh, hello," the hotel manager smiled.

"Where the hell AM I?" Sayoko had to ask, looking around her curiously.

"New Zealand." he answered innocently.

Sayoko groaned, moving to look out a nearby window as her thoughts raced. 'That means someone else has moved in. I've failed.' she mused.

'New Zealand...that sounded like the work of that hussy from the CIA!' Sayoko thought with professional admiration. She resisted the urge to cry as she added, 'And I was so close! Now Shinji-kun's going to be preyed upon by her and that French whore!' The girl mentally reviewed the list of competitors, trying to recall who was next in line to obtain Shinji's affection.

Then she paled at the thought of a red-eyed woman with pink hair who had recently arrived. That English girl...Alice Twilight...

Sayoko sighed in resignation. 'It's practically a done deal now. No way Shinji-kun manages to resist her...' she mused, sighing, 'well, might as well relax before reporting back.' Looking up at the hotel manager, the Japanese girl talked in fluent English. "Excuse me sir, but what are your accommodations?"

"You're booked for the rest of the week, actually," the man noted, slightly bewildered.

Silently thanking her competitor Sayoko smiled, "Thank you. Could you order me a very stiff drink? I think I'm going to enjoy some sunbathing."

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0**

Deborah Chambers of the CIA would have been deeply amused to hear her rival's thoughts, considering her own lack of success with Ikari. It wasn't that he wasn't nice, polite and pleasant. It was that he was sufficiently jaded to be well aware that people were out to get him and had developed a pretty casual attitude to it all.

"So, Miss Deborah," Shinji smiled as the teenager bought her a drink, "you're with the CIA, right? Is Director Whitman still there?"

"Uhm, I don't know what you mean?" Deborah smiled as innocently as she could manage even as her thoughts raced. 'Did I break cover, somehow?' she wondered.

Shinji gave her a look of amusement mixed with experience. "Deborah, I've had strange girls chasing me for years now. Do you really think I'd be dumb enough not to realize what's going on?"

Deborah opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"Especially considering who my parents are?" he added wryly, Shinji patting her arm comfortingly.

"Point," Deborah conceded. She gave him a thoughtful look, "You seem to be coping pretty well with all this."

"It kind of nice having hordes of women trying to charm me," Shinji shrugged, "I try not to take it too seriously, of course." A little sadly he added, "I'd like to have something more, but I suppose I can wait until the interest in me dies down."

Deborah felt a surprising pang of sympathy for the young man, trying to imagine how he must feel. 'No!' she firmly reminded herself, 'I'm on the job, here! I can't let myself be distracted!'

A sly smile tugged on Shinji's lips, "How much of a expense account do you have, by the way?"

"Reasonably sized," Deborah conceded after a moment.

"Wanna have some fun?" Shinji grinned.

Three weeks later Director Whitman was looking at the invoices, blinking as he silently read, 'Fifty pounds of whipped cream, a rubber wading pool, rubber snakes and a portable karaoke system? What the heck?'

Deborah was sitting across from him, her cheeks faintly red as he looked at her questioningly. "Don't ask," she sighed, "please." 

Whitman rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on. "He's really that persuasive?" he asked the young woman across from him.

Deborah sighed as she told him, "Just think about it a little, sir. He's been dealing with and charming female agents for years at this point." With a certain wry amusement she added, "I think we've created a monster."

To be continued...?

Notes: This started out from ideas on the Spacebattles thread for 'Your Happy Years' by Gregg Landsman, especially his abandoned idea of Shinji being mobbed by girlfriends sent by various spy agencies. When he decided to drop that idea I asked if I could use it, and he said okay. Ultra Sonic 007 also contributed a chunk of material, and I tip my hat to 'him.'

Jesse Gartland is based off a character from Battle Athletes Victory. Mari Illustrious Makinami is from Rebuild of Evangelion, tho I'm not really writing her in character.

Ultra Sonic 007 wrote up a series of rules for the various girls fighting over Shinji. I ultimately re-phrased it and slipped it into the introduction, but here's his work as mostly originally written.

The innocuous-sounding League had been established for one sole purpose: obtaining access to NERV via Shinji Ikari. Naturally, the chosen method was via women. However, given the vast interest that most nations/private organizations/cults had in NERV, there had to be a way to minimize... bloodshed. After all, if their efforts (and subsequent clashes) alienated the boy from human contact, it wouldn't do them any good at all.

Thus, there were the rules of the League:

No overt combat between...'competitors', so to speak. In other words, nothing that resulted in fatal wounds that would inevitably attract international attention.

Nothing that could be witnessed by Shinji Ikari himself. Having him be privy to the exact nature of the women attempting to woo him (or, as it often turned out, him inadvertently wooing them) would be counter to their purpose.

No more than three competitors could vie for the boy's affection at any given moment. Anything beyond that would trigger suspicion.

Aside from that...everything else was fair game.


End file.
